Urgent! Parental power: reclaim your essential power to parent

Parenting today feels more complicated than ever, with endless advice, societal pressures, and the fear of making the wrong choices. Many parents find themselves second-guessing their instincts, unsure of how to balance authority with compassion. It’s time to step away from the noise and trust that you know what’s best for your child. You have the power to parent. Reclaim your parenting confidence by:

1. Setting firm yet loving boundaries
2. Making informed decisions
3. And tuning into your child’s needs

The Village

Parenting advice is everywhere—books, social media, well-meaning family members—but it’s important to remember that advice is just that: advice, not instructions. Every child, family, and situation is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Too often, parents feel pressured to follow expert recommendations to the letter, fearing they’ll fail their child if they don’t. But true confidence in parenting comes from filtering advice through your own values, instincts, and the specific needs of your child. Guidance should empower, not dictate.

The saying “It takes a village to raise a child” reminds us that parenting was never meant to be a solo journey. Support from extended family, friends, teachers, and the wider community can be invaluable. A village offers wisdom, perspective, and sometimes a helping hand when the demands of parenting feel overwhelming. However, the role of a village is to come alongside you, not to take over your parenting. It exists to support, not to replace. Parents should feel strengthened by their village, not undermined by conflicting opinions or unwanted interference.

At the heart of it all, you remain the expert on your child. Advice is a tool to guide your decisions, not a set of strict rules to follow. Seek perspectives that resonate with you and lean on your village when needed. Ultimately, the responsibility—and privilege—of raising your child is yours. The best choices come from love, understanding, and confidence in yourself.

Knowledge is for everybody

Knowledge should never be locked away, reserved only for a select few. It belongs to everyone because it is the foundation of informed decision-making. When people have access to knowledge, they gain the ability to think critically, challenge assumptions, and make choices that align with their values and needs. Without it, we are left vulnerable—forced to rely on incomplete information, outdated beliefs, or the opinions of others without understanding the full picture. Knowledge is power. But I also firmly believe knowledge is freedom.

• Freedom from bias.
• Freedom from fear.
• Freedom from confusion.
• Freedom from stigma.
• Freedom from helplessness.

When we understand something—whether it’s parenting, neurodiversity, or our own emotions—we remove the uncertainty that often breeds doubt and anxiety. Knowledge empowers us to step forward with confidence, to advocate for ourselves and others, and to break free from limiting narratives. True freedom isn’t just about having choices; it’s about having the understanding needed to make the best ones.

Hold on to your kids

​In their influential book, Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers, authors Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté emphasize that no one loves your children as deeply as you do. They argue that parents hold their children’s success and happiness closest to their hearts, underscoring the importance of maintaining strong parental bonds. This connection is vital because, as a parent, you are uniquely invested in your child’s well-being and future.

The authors highlight the dangers of children becoming more oriented toward their peers than their parents, a trend that can undermine healthy development. By “holding on” to your kids, you ensure that they receive guidance from those who truly have their best interests at heart. This approach fosters a secure environment where children can thrive under the care of those who love them most.

For more insights, you can purchase Hold On to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté.

10 Things you can do easily to reclaim your power to parent:

1. Arm Yourself with Knowledge – Educate yourself about child development, parenting approaches, and your child’s unique needs. Knowledge empowers you to make informed decisions rather than reacting out of fear or uncertainty.
2. Relax in the Love You Have for Your Child – Your love is the most important guiding force in your parenting. Even when you doubt yourself, remember that your deep care and connection matter more than getting everything “right.”
3. Know That Mistakes Can Be Fixed – No parent is perfect. Mistakes are opportunities for growth, and what matters most is how you handle them. Apologise when needed, learn from the experience, and move forward with confidence.
4. Trust Your Instincts – Parenting advice is everywhere, but no one knows your child as well as you do. Take in what resonates with you, but trust your gut when it comes to your child’s well-being.
5. Set Boundaries Without Guilt – Being a strong, loving parent means setting limits. Boundaries provide security, structure, and guidance, helping your child learn responsibility and emotional regulation.
6. Surround Yourself with a Supportive Village – Seek out people who uplift and respect your parenting choices. Whether it’s family, friends, therapists or like-minded parents, having a support system helps you feel grounded.
7. Take Breaks and Care for Yourself – You can’t pour from an empty cup. Prioritising rest, hobbies, or even a few deep breaths when overwhelmed allows you to parent from a place of calm rather than stress.
8. Focus on Connection Over Perfection – Your child doesn’t need a flawless parent; they need a present, emotionally available one. Prioritise connection, and discipline or guidance will naturally follow from that bond.
9. Let Go of Comparisons – Every child is different, and every family has its own rhythm. Comparing yourself or your child to others only creates unnecessary stress. Trust that your journey is uniquely yours.
10. Embrace Flexibility – Parenting isn’t about rigid rules; it’s about adapting to your child’s needs while holding onto your core values. Being open to change allows you to respond to challenges with confidence rather than frustration.

Why choose Help My Child as your source of knowledge?

When it comes to understanding neurodiversity and child development, Help My Child is your trusted source of knowledge. Our internationally CPD-accredited courses provide evidence-based, practical insights tailored for parents, teachers, and therapists. We don’t just offer information—we empower you with the confidence to make informed decisions that truly support the children in your care. With a focus on real-world application, compassionate guidance, and expert-backed content, Help My Child ensures that knowledge is accessible, practical, and designed to help you navigate challenges with clarity and confidence. Because when you understand, you can parent with power.